Thursday, July 23, 2015

What Do You Need in a Relationship? Besides "Love."

Here's my top five things:

     Do I feel heard and understood?

2.  FUN:
     Do I have fun with you?

3.  TRUST:
     Are you a safe harbour where I can moor my boat?
     Is it safe to come home?
     Will I be nurtured and cared for?

     Is my body accepted and loved by you?
     Is a hug or cuddle available or withheld?
     Are my physical needs validated or mocked?

     Do you respect my concerns or devalue them?

These components are provided in varying degrees at various times.  We might prefer 100% of these all the time, but we find we can be happy with some other percent.  Some days, we are only able to give 70% ourselves.

What are your desired components?

What do you give?

Ask your partner.  It might be a scary conversation, but it seems like a genuine one and might keep you from being blindsided by some imagined dissatisfaction down the road.

1 comment:

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